14 February 2013

Police Blotter: It's That Time Again

Time for this week's installment of the Unalaska Police Blotter. I believe the first three calls are related ...

Assault – Brother called to report his inebriated sibling had attacked him with a cane. Officers responded to the residence and a witness said no assault had occurred.

Welfare Check – Inebriated brother called to report that something was wrong with his inebriated sibling. Officers responded to the residence and were told that a pretty woman was doing things with his sibling.

Assistance Rendered – Inebriated brother called to report his inebriated sibling had told him to shut up. Officers responded to the residence and found the two were arguing about a pretty woman.

Assistance Rendered – Caller reported finding a .22 caliber round in a public facility, and asked officers to remove it.

Omigosh! a .22!!! Call the cops!  Oh. Wait. They did.

Traffic Crime – Caller reported being nearly struck by another driver who simply sped off. An officer contacted the suspect driver, who apologized for both the near miss and the misunderstanding at the scene.

Suspicious Person/Activity – Second-hand report of two men in dark clothing playing chicken with drivers on an unlit roadway. An officer responded to the area but found no pedestrians.

Maybe the second group of folks were the same as the first. Which leads to a question: "nearly hitting" a pedestrian is a misunderstanding? Oh whose part?

Theft – A man reported that $400 had been stolen from his sweatpants while he was sleeping in them. The man’s roommates denied taking the money, and none of the missing cash was located. Under investigation.

Welfare Check – Officer checked the airport terminal after multiple 911 calls were received from a pay phone at that location. The officer was told by one child that another child had seen a monster and so had phoned 911. The officer did not find any of the aforesaid monsters in the terminal.

I wonder if they called Larry Corriea:^)


CottonLady said...

One just can't make this stuff up, can they?! Love it!

Hope you're feeling better.


Rev. Paul said...

CottonLady, the police blotter is almost always good. Thank you!

Bob said...

Discovered a Twitter guy today (via the immortal Iowahawk) who calls himself "Florida Man." His schtick is to take innocuous news headlines from various media outlets and pretend he is the subject of them all, e.g., "Florida Man Leaves Pit Bull To Babysit Infant Child."


Rev. Paul said...

That's interesting, Bob. Whatever works for him, I guess.

Old NFO said...

Nope, you CANNOT make this up... sigh...

Rev. Paul said...

NFO, it's the age-old story: man + woman + booze = stupid.

threecollie said...

As always, these are a wonderful tonic on a cold winter morning. Thanks!

Chickenmom said...

This is just too funny! Thanks for the good laugh this morning.
'Hope you are feeling better - just reading the above should put a smile on!

Phyllis (N/W Jersey)

Rev. Paul said...

threecollie, you're welcome. :)

Chickenmom, I'm glad you like it as much as I do. Yes, I am feeling better; thanks!