05 January 2015

Unalaska Police Blotter: the Testosterone-Fueled Edition

Complaint about a bunkhouse tenant who had been shaking his fists in another tenant’s face. Officers advised the cheerless man, who complained about everything from lack of freezer space to noisy cooks, to avoid blaming his neighbors for everything.
So now we know where Scrooge moved...

Public Safety
Officers returned to the CEM dock regarding an unconscious man found near the office there. The dipsomaniac, who was able to respond to officers’ questions, denied being hurt and said he was ready to go to jail.
 Apparently he already knew the drill. :)

Assistance Rendered / Drunk Disturbance
Caller requested assistance removing a drunken employee from a business premise, then decided to let the dipsomaniac sleep off his stupor on-site before firing him.

[Four hours later] The dipsomaniac who had been fired from his previous employment made his way to a different vessel at a different dock, where he was again told by vessel management and police officers to leave.

Assistance Rendered
Officers and Troopers stood by at the airport while several inebriated would-be passengers were denied boarding due to their levels of intoxication. Some of the inebriates took this denial with less equanimity than others, and were escorted from the airport by their employer.

Officers responded to a mêlée outside the airport, and found about a dozen alcohol- and testosterone-fueled fishermen milling about the bathroom. The men, only one of whom was injured, could not individually provide any coherent story but collectively related a tale of fishermen gone bad, quite possibly as a result of over-consumption of alcohol.
Someone cue Waylon Jennings, please?

Assault A man voiding his bladder in public threatened another man who had the impertinence to order him to cease micturating. The unruly urinator was advised that he could be barred from company premises if he continued to create problems. The victim did not wish to pursue charges.

Assault Officers investigating a report that one man had pushed another at Safeway found an agitated victim whose description of a terrifying and painful push became increasingly unbelievable, and who made statements indicating he intended to rectify matters with or without police intervention. Store management asked that the man be escorted from the premises for the night.


Teresa said...

I see Alaska continues to be amusing. :D I missed dropping by over the holidays so hope you had a lovely Christmas and New Year. :D

Rev. Paul said...

Happy new year, T - and thanks. :)

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Ah, the fleet is in.

Rev. Paul said...

Entirely possible, sir.

Murphy's Law said...

Yeah, I know where I'm going on my next vacation...

Rev. Paul said...

Sounds good, ML, as long as you promise to stop in Anchorage to say howdy.