30 April 2015

Police Blotter: Small Humans and Angry Inebriates

The captain of a fishing vessel told police that one of his crew had, against orders, returned both late and inebriated to the vessel. The crewman had, after being told several times that he was an idiot for having done so and an idiot for then arguing about it, punched his captain in the neck. The captain did not wish to pursue charges but asked for help getting the angry inebriate off the vessel.

Complaint about small humans riding small motorbikes on Steward Road. Officers this time found and identified the miscreants, and spoke with both the small humans and their parents about the laws regarding motorbike use.

Liquor Law Violation
Officer advised an extremely intoxicated man he was not allowed to enter any bars or liquor stores this night. The inebriate, after having uttered quite a few vulgarities, was led away by two much more sober and polite companions.

A most inebriated Richard William Fatuesi, 31 yoa, became increasingly combative after he was asked by staff to leave the bar due to his decidedly unpleasant demeanor, and attempted to fight with several security officers and a responding police officer. Fatuesi was ultimately restrained and arrested on three counts of Assault IV.

Traffic Crime
Complaint about small humans zipping about on small motorbikes. Officers attempted to trap the miscreants on Steward Road but discovered alas that they were nowhere to be found.

Witnesses and video surveillance identified a man who had stolen a bar patron’s jacket and cell phone moments after the victim left the items unattended on a bar stool. The suspect, when located, denied all wrongdoing. Michael H. Martin, 47 yoa, was charged with one count of Theft III.

Assistance Rendered
A driver crossing the end of the runway found herself mere feet underneath a landing Ace Cargo plane, and was quite upset that the runway gates and crossing lights had not been activated prior to the plane’s landing. Information passed on to DOT.

Suspicious Person/Activity
Officers responding to a report of a man wandering about a residence, banging on doors and windows, found a cold, wet and befuddled inebriate who had been dropped off at the wrong location and was looking for help getting home. Taxis being unavailable, an officer provided him with transport.


Well Seasoned Fool said...

Punching your employer doesn't seem to be a winning strategy. That is no place to be with no job and little or no money

Rev. Paul said...

WSF, that's a quite-accurate description. And clearly the puncher wasn't sober enough to care.

Chickenmom said...

Small humans?? Should have sent out the dog catcher with a net! LOL

Rev. Paul said...

You're a funny lady, Chickenmom. That's not bad!