PASTOR: "Praise the Lord!"
PASTOR: "Will everyone please turn on their tablet, notebook, iPad, smart phone, or Kindle Bible to 1st Corinthians 13:13. And please switch on your Bluetooth to download the sermon."
"Now, Let us pray committing this week into God's hands. Open your apps, BBM, Twitter and Facebook, and chat with God."
"As we take our Sunday tithes and offerings, please have your credit and debit cards ready. You can log on to the church wi-fi using the password 'Lord909887'.
"The ushers will circulate mobile card swipe machines among the worshipers. Those who prefer to make electronic fund transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the church. Those who prefer to use iPads can open them. Those who prefer telephone banking, take out your cellphones to transfer your contributions to the church account. You may text your offerings to 99885. The automatic reply will contain a link to a direct deposit log-in."
The holy atmosphere of the Church becomes truly electrified as ALL the smart phones, iPads, notebooks, iPads, Fires and laptops beep and flicker!
Final Blessing and Closing Announcements...
"This week's ministry cell meetings will be held on the various Facebook group pages where the usual group chatting takes place. Please log in a few minutes early for special announcements. You don't want to miss out on anything.
"Finally, Thursday's Bible study will be held live on Skype at 1900hrs GMT. Please don't miss this, either. You can follow your Pastor on Facebook and Twitter this weekend for counseling and prayers. God bless you and have nice day!"
h/t MO Bro
h/t MO Bro